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La Blue GirlSynopsisMido Miko is the next in line of inheriting the esteemed (yeah, right) title of Sex-Ninja trained in the arts of sex-magic. Thus, she and her sister is target for general unpleasantness by tentacled demons wanting.... wait for it.... yes, sex. In the only episode I've seen, Miko's sister is kidnapped by said demons and it's up to Miko to save her. Unfortunately, seeing as Miko is a stupid twit, that won't happen before both of them is thoroughly raped by all manners of demons with questionable -- if not depressingly predictable -- tastes in appendages. ReviewIf curiosity killed the cat, then this title is a cat-murderer extraordinaire. The levels of sheer stupidity this title allows itself to sink into is really astounding and I still have to figure out what possessed me to watch even one episode of this. I guess sometimes curiosity is far more trouble than it's worth. At the risk of sounding like I'm bragging (of which I'll assure you I'm not), my threshold for bad/stupid/disgusting hentai is probably a bit higher than Carlos's. Then again, he watched two episodes while I bailed out after just one. And for good reason at that. Even though Battle Can-Can is a worse title than this one, that's not really saying much. You can pretty much say that about anything except Violence Jack. On a technical level, it's far worse. Let's recap: The animation is bad, bad, bad, bad, BAD, BAD! It's pretty close to the animation badness of Crying Freeman, and that takes some stinking EFFORT! The acting? There's no way to put it differently; it's heinous. Miko herself really starts off on the wrong foot, as the first thing you'll notice is her irritating and whining voice. This is only surpassed by that of her ninja servant, who has a voice that could crack a whetstone. The music? Well, bad. And I mean hentai-bad. Which makes it so laughable that it isn't even something I think Joe Hisaishi would use to wipe his behind with. And the characters.... man, I've got my work cut out for me just trying to project the sheer dim-wittedness of them all! Miko herself really takes the cake, as she spends most of the show talking about her sisters panties, throwing herself out the window of the ten-plus story building because she's late for school and screaming her lungs out on the way down about how she's gonna die (don't I wish....) This, of course, being her way of letting everyone in the neighborhood know that her royal stupidness has left the building again in the most unintelligent way possible. Oh, by the way: you'll recognize her as the girl wearing a ribbon that should have been outlawed in every country in the world, mainly because it gives her "Peg Bundy" hair. And that's not all. She isn't above using stupid sexual connotations in puns so bad, it'd reduce Captain Planet to a crying, quivering mass of utter helplessness. I mean, who the hell comes up with lines like "If I don't get out of this one, I'm screwed.... literally." It's no wonder said tentacle monsters are putting their unmentionables in her mouth, since it shuts her the hell up. Having to rely on that stupid ninja sidekick to save her each and every time has to be pretty embarrassing, this added upon the embarrassment of actually making an appearance in a series like this. I've always wondered why there seems to be no quality control in hentai anime. I'm talking about a guy who's job it is to tell the creators that: "You know, having our heroine turn her pubic hair into laser needles shooting out of her crotch... That's just too friggin' stupid. It needs to go. And who came up with the idea with the tentacle rapes?" *hand raises in the back* "Well, then. You're fired! And if there are any justice in this world, you will remain jobless for the rest of your life." So instead of spending any money on this tripe, go buy Carlos a Purple Heart. He certainly deserves it for watching stuff like this just so you don't have to. And that'll be my last words on this series. Don't! Just.... just don't! The sheer idiocy sorta makes up for the slight lack of disgustedness compared to Battle Can-Can. To the creators of this series I have this to say: Congratulations on almost equalling that piece of parp, you disgusting freaks. — Stig Høgset Recommended Audience: Basement boys with nothing better to do than ogle scenes of sex abuse. Yeah, this is some real classy stuff we have here. Version(s) Viewed: R1 DVD Review Status: Partial (1/6) La Blue Girl © 1992 Maeda Toshio / Daiei Co Ltd |
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